Monthly Archives: May 2012

My Love Story, Part 2: Falling in Love with a Savior

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If you haven’t already, make sure you go and read Part 1: The Hang-Ups.

After learning my lesson the hard way (not one, but TWO times), I decided that I would, for one, never date someone who does not share my love for Christ EVER again. That’s right, men. I have standards. I GOT THE POWAH. Yeah.

But secondly, I decided to finally take the time to fall in love with my Savior.

I knew it was possible. I remember reading through a Biblezine (yes…it’s a Bible in magazine format. Basically like a Study Bible for teen girls–AWESOME ministry) in 8th grade or so and seeing my Savior for the Bridegroom He truly is, for the very first time.

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My Love Story, Part 1: The Hang-Ups

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My favorite story to tell is that of my love life. For some reason, I love to recount the story of the different guys I’ve dated and what I’ve learned. Perhaps because the greatest life lessons come from your closest relationships.

This is just a story. I’m going out on a limb even posting this, because I often get terrified of what people think of me, or how people might perceive those who are mentioned in my posts (even if no names are given). And I want to say before we jump in…these guys that I dated had tons of good qualities and it wasn’t that “they weren’t good enough”. I simply want to show you what happens to me when I allow someone so close who does not have the same worldview as me.

But if you’re a single Christian man or woman, looking for a spouse one day…please, please take heed of all this. I’m not writing to teach a lesson. I’m writing to show you my heart, and what happens to it when you give it to a human to twist and turn it, and not to a God who knows what He’s doing when he twists and turns it. This is my journey of figuring out that He comes first, because no human can ever do everything He does for me.

I had always been told to never date a non-Christian man. I had been told (and oh, I learned) that non-Christian men couldn’t love me to their or my fullest potential, that they couldn’t be a spiritual leader, and that our differing worldviews would clash and it would never work. Furthermore, I had been told (and oh, I learned) that a man would never truly change his heart and mind to follow Jesus by being with me…if he did, it would only be for me; and if it was truly for himself, he still could not be my spiritual leader. We must be at the same place spiritually in order for him to lead me. (Refer back to my last post for some links to some even better reasons that I didn’t know then.)

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30Rock and Relationships

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My fiance and I have been watching a lot of 30Rock lately. Well…”a lot” is an understatement. We had a marathon of the entire second season on Thursday. I don’t even want to know how many hours that is.

And I started thinking last night, as he drove me home…that maybe the reason I love 30Rock so much is because I AM LIZ LEMON. But my personal life was definitely not as screwed up as hers. Or so I thought.

Until…

(Yes. There must always be an “until”.)

I was nosing around on the Good Women Project last night (FANTASTIC website. So encouraging and helpful) and came across this post about playing the God card in dating situations. You know…”I can’t date you because you’re not a Christian.” It’s not exactly the most helpful thing in the world. And…I totally relate to that, because that’s what I did…in my head, and to other guys. The result? I always gave in to those guys. The ones who weren’t Christians…because I couldn’t stand to cause them the confusion that comes with “the God Card”.

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Forgiveness is Beautiful.

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I have understood that forgiveness is important ever since I was little…really, since before I can remember.

But I don’t think I’ve understood the importance of forgiveness until quite recently.

You see, it’s so easy to speak forgiveness yet still hang onto all of your feelings and pride. Surely feelings aren’t prideful, but when you mentally hang them over someone else’s head every time they begin to annoy you…well, I think you know where I’m going with this.

And sometimes, even when you go into a situation determined to forgive someone, you still are unable to do it right away. That’s the tricky thing–you never really know what’s coming when someone says “We need to talk.”

But when all of your tears have been cried, and you’ve asked for healing, you don’t have to be hurt again.

All of a sudden, God showed me a beautiful peace. And the only message throughout my heart was, “I have already forgiven. And nothing lurking in either of your pasts can ever, ever take away from the great and beautiful things I want to give you.”

I think that’s what he meant when he commanded us to forgive our brothers “Seventy times seven”.

This Time Last Year…

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It’s kinda funny, I guess, that my first “official” post on this blog is a little nostalgic.

Or maybe it isn’t.

Either way…looking at all these pictures of my friends, just one year younger than me, graduating, brings back some pretty fond memories.

Where was I a year ago?

To be honest, the things I have always remembered the most poignantly when looking back haven’t been the places I lived, the car I drove, the grade I was in, what age I was, or any other material thing…it has always been my closest relationships that define eras in my life.

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A Step Up

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My first post…everything feels so fresh!

I’m scuttling on over here because I decided it was time for a change. I’ve been on Tumblr for quite awhile now. And I’ve posted many a meaningful blog there…but I really want a place to store my written thoughts and feelings, and read others’, too. My dashboard on Tumblr tends to get flooded with pictures and teen angst, which is why I decided that graduation to a proper blogging service should be in order.

Don’t worry, I’ll still be over there. Those pictures and gifs are still close to my heart.

I hope to talk about things I learn here. I love sharing the lessons God teaches me and the ways he touches my heart.

Keep your eye out for more posts!